.
It’s Fun Friday once again at Blogging for Fun.Topic: Fave Five Books. This is difficult because I cannot limit my favorites to five, so I settled for seven (hehe). I call these books: books by my bedside table. Read more. . .
.
.
.
.
09
Jun
On My Way to Work
.
I took these photos for our Salitype’s Fun with Photos: On My Way to Work (topic), but instead of just posting the photos in our Salitype thread, I was led to reminisce my carpool days. The photos led me to write a blog entry, I just go where I am led. . .
.
.
This photos show the route I’ve been taking since the first day I worked here in America some six years ago.
.
My first carpool buddy was a friend and neighbor, Ruby, who kindly offered me a ride to and from work. It was working out so well despite the fact that she works in another school.We carpooled for some three months then a co-teacher invited me to their already existing carpool gang. This is a better idea because then Ruby doesn’t have to go out-of-way just to bring me and pick me up from my school.
.
One advantage of being in a carpool is the High Occupancy Vehicle (HOV) lane. This lane is less congested.
.
There were three of them in the carpool gang plus me equals four.We were the Brady Bunch!Tzei Fei Lui and Mike Lo are both Taiwanese while Ate Excem and I are both Filipinos. On better days, we talk of common things (with a common language -English) like school talkies. On our Brady-Bunch days, Tzei-Fei and Mike speak in their native Mandarin while Ate Excem and I in our native tagalog –all at the same time -no kidding –hahaha! It sounds like the culmination of the First Pentecost –gift of tongue–everybody speaking in different languages –hehe
.
Heading towards Houston downtown and beyond. On days like these, the HOV lane is our ticket to faster travel time.
.
Well, actually on MY better days –I close my eyes and sleep (snore? I guess) I am notorious for this trait. The moment my back rests on the car seat, I am off to dreamland. I guess I got this habit from being the eternal passenger. During college days, I’ve wasted tokens at the LRT for sleeping and missing my station!
.
Each one of the gang takes turn to bring their car, am the only one of the gang who is the forever passenger. In turn, I pay for our gasoline expenses. It worked out well for four years.Then Tzei-Feigot married, moved to a new house and left our carpool gang.There were only three of us for a while -Mike, Ate Excemand me.Ate Excem resigned and pursued her masters.Mike and I carpooled ’til the end of that school year some two years ago then he moved-in with his older brother in the other side of town. I thought it’s about time I start driving to work –how, I’ll never know! Then Poorva stepped in. I found out we are neighbors and blessing of blessings, after carpooling for some months, she and her husband purchased a house near our house –five minutes away from my place, we are now officially neighbors! Life works in mysterious ways.
.
Poorva and I are nearing our destiny -Lakewood Elementary School (Tidwell Road)
These roads are the backdrops for the years of friendship I shared (and will continue to share) with these wonderful people who have been and are good Samaritans to me.
.
I have been seeing this shack for the past six years and have NO idea why it has a sign that says “Toddlers and Pre-school” Weird huh!
.
My every day journey on my way to work has been and will be filled with laughter, good conversation and a little dose of rest.
.
.
.
08
Jun
Teacher Jennie
.
I heard a tooting sound from somewhere . . .it sounded like an alarm . . .alarm for what?. . . we just got back from a party, it would be too early for an alarm to go. . . and WHERE? Jen and I searched the shelves in my craft room for the seemingly-broken alarm that wouldn’t stop tooting and found Doods’s watch. It was tooting because it was already 5 AM! Whoa, that meant Jen and I have been talking for hours and have not noticed the time. It is always such when friends fall into deep and pleasant conversation. . .
.
I remember the first time Jen and I stayed awake talking till the wee hours of the morning – April 6, 1994, the first (of many) retreats as teachers in Colegio San Agustin. Jen and I were hired the same school year, yeap, she and I are batch mates in CSA (faculty). We were the only new teachers in the Kinder-Prep (KP) department that school year, also two of the youngest teachers in the KP faculty. Our department (KP) was not a big group -with less than 30 teachers (at that time) which made it easy to bond, as a result the turn-over wasn’t that much (during our days).My “KP family” is another blog altogether.
.
We went to Baguio that April 1994 for the annual faculty retreat. Retreat took four days (April 6-10) but Jen, I and some other teachers stayed for an additional 3 days to explore. Jen and I, who were not far from being strangers at that time, shared the same room (double occupancy). I cannot remember how the room in Betania retreat house looked, but I still remember how we talked . . . oh boy how we talked! We talked as if there would be no tomorrow. None of us were inhibited to spill out our sentiments, as well as our aspirations as new teachers. Nothing was the same after that retreat; it wasn’t just Jen and I who connected. She and I had a chance to bond with our new family -KP
.
KP retreat at Betania Retreat House -April 6-10, 1994
.
Exploring Baguio after the 1994 retreat
.
Going home to Manila from Baguio
.
Two people who are so different in many ways and yet. . . has a lot in common with things that count!She is tall, I am short. She came from a small family, mine is huge. She was not so outgoing (but very friendly), while I was juggling with my schedule (parish involvement).She was timid, I was outspoken. But despite the differences, we had chemistry. The things we have in common surpassed our differences. For one, we were both too lazy to bring food (baon) to school (we were younger then), so we were frequent customers of CSA cafeteria –boasts of being the longest school cafeteria in the world (recorded in the Guinness book of world record) er… who could blame us for eating there every day -hehe.We loved Tokyo-tokyo, our favorite was Totkatsu, and that booth that served chicken with rice for only P20. (Jen, remember that Korean booth that serves cold sprouts (toge) for P10?) The siomai and the “manggang hilaw with bagoong.” Sometimes, we take that long trip just to grab ourselves fries from Potato Corner (best fries I’ve ever tasted) Another thing Jen and I have in common, was our favorite brand of shoes –Cherie- so comfy, especially for teachers who are standing for a long period of time. And of course, we both love what we do –teaching! But of all the things we have in common, our love for our students was the thing that really brought us close.
.
Jen was well-loved by the students. On her first year in CSA, she was a “floating teacher.”She substituted for whoever was absent that day, thus almost all the students know her. Whenever she walks in the round building, the kids wave eagerly and call out at the top of their lungs “Hi, Teacher Jennie!”In fact, one profound memory I have was when we went to Speaker of the house, De Venecia’s place, his daughter, KC (may she rest in peace) who was only Prep then, came rushing to the arms of Teacher Jennie and eagerly pulled Jen’s hand to show Jen her (KC’s) bedroom and artworks.
.
Jen and I shared many wonderful years in CSA, until she resigned to be fulltime wife and mommy. Last May 14-17 (2009) albeit a short time, the KP family was once again reunited with Jen, who, with her son, Amir, detoured to Houston from visiting her mom (in California) to spend precious four days with us.
.
Best buddy, Jen, it’s so good to see you again and do things for you and with you!Fabulous four days, girl!Well worth looking back at!
.
We all admire how you are raising Amir! Smart, well-behaved, well-mannered and so easy to please!
.
From your KP family here in Houston Hugs, kisses and much love to you and Amir!
.
There are over a hundred photos from your Houston visit (what with four, or was it five cameras –hehe) but I’ve decided to walk with you and the rest of the gang down memory lane. . .
.
.
Dancing to Back Street Boy’s “Quit Playing Games with my Heart”
Tes, Charlene, Diane, Lina, Jen and Charms
.
Sino ang makukulet na nag baon ng clothes to change for the party? I see Lina, Emchichay, Charlene. . . (hahaha!)
.
KP gals dancing to the disco version of Aladdin’s “A Whole New World”
Even our dance tune sounds so Kinder-Prep! hehe
.
we’re posing here with the Bb Pilipinas Candidates (Circa 1960) hehe
just in case you’re wondering, I was calling Yolly. . .
(Charms, Lins, Jen, Emchichay, Tes, Diane, Lecheng and Luzvi)
.
The four peeps on the side, that was us, Jen -Emchichay was telling us about her friend who died from being swept by a current. . .
Faculty outing at Nasugbu, Batangas
.
typical KP “free” lunch (library)
.
“New” uniforms (from Meneses) hanging at the fire extinguisher! Hehe
.
I placed this photo because it reminded me of our “Bring-your-own-plate” party! Hahaha!
.
KP Sports Fest -CSA turned 25 -Soaring high shirt
.
A glimpse of our playground at the backyard. . . I miss it!
.
Clippings from our CSA newsletter
.
.
.
Now this is the bomb! They can never make us wear the knee-socks! Hahaha! I have to admit, it looked good on Lacheng, Ate Cors and Te Jessie! But Coach Mario is a different story (just kidding, Coach! Hehe)
.
Despedida for Tina Bantug -I think am calling your attention to look at the camera (at Mang Dodong)
.
World Youth Day ‘94
.
Celebrating Jen’s Birthday in Houston
.
Jen and Amir’s Houston Visit -May 14, 2009 (Te Luzvi’s house)
Buen (this tall boy beside me) was our ring bearer -he was only 3 yrs old then -he’s so tall now!
.
Jen and Amir visit our school, Lakewood Elementary School
.
Dinner at Landry’s Seafood House
Now that Alien that Jen is carrying has a story. There’s a booth that has a boy and a girl that tries to guess people’s age. They tried to guess mine -24! Teehee - and that’s how we won the alien! (hehe)
.
Amir with Kuya Buen and kuya Miggs (checking our Kuya Buen’s cap collection)
.
Horsing around with Kuya Jonnell
.
Jen and Amir fresh from the airport
.
A warm welcome to Jen and Amir!
.
At Kemah (theme park) Amir hit the hoops and made the shot on his FIRST try! Horray for Amir!
.
Amir bonded with the kuya’s right away
.
I am very much looking forward to seeing you again in the Philippines. Till we meet again, bestbud, Jen!
.
.
.
27
May
Children’s Wear
.
I usually shop in the juniors section of the store, if not in the petite, but I never thought I could find something from the children’s section! Hahaha! Yeap, that’s how tiny I am.
.
.
I saw this pair of pink flowery top and leggings in the fitting room rack. Tried it without checking the size, and voila, perfect fit! When I checked the size, it’s 14! (children’s) hehe! I still tried the biggest, which is size 16, thinking it might have a better dynamics in terms of fit, but it was a bit too big. I settled for the one I tried -14! Nuff said! Hahaha!
.
Don’t get me wrong, am NOT trying to look like a little girl, this style is also available in the juniors and womens’ section, except the smallest size in those departments is still too big for me.
.
Some weeks ago, we celebrated Girls’ Week in our school. Every day of that week, there was an assigned “something” to wear. On the “WEAR-PINK” day, I wore my pink flowery pair and joined my girls in celebrating “cancer awareness” day.
.
Guess what the brand’s name is, DISORDERLY KIDS! Now there is NO way I can deny that I am WEARING a pair of children’s wear! Hahaha!
.
.
Saw this old pair that I bought from the Philippines in 2005 -they go well with my children’s wear (teehee)
.
.
.
23
May
Got DSLR Will Shoot
.
I’ve been blogging back to back lately. I can’t help it, it is very addicting, and most of you know what I mean! *winks*
.
Now this I can’t pass-up! Guess what guys, I’ve got a digital SLR!!! Weeee! Nothing spectacular but it’s huge to me! Hehe
.
So funny, just a week ago, I asked Doods to take a photo of my old Jurassic camera because I was about to post it in our “TSS Fun with Photos.” He almost grimaced at how old and beaten my camera looks! Hehe, It does look awful on the outside because of the constant jamming in my pocket and bag, that on top of the hundred times my students have dropped it. The edges are dented and the outer skin is peeling off. That’s to be expected, I had it since 2005 and carry it practically everywhere!
.
The thing is, despite having my handy chrome machine, I still like to take photos with Doods’s digital SLR (Single-lens Reflex). It has functions that I really like. But every time he asks me if I want one, I refuse to commit. I can predict that I might not “maximize” the use of the huge machine because it’s a bit too heavy for me and I can almost picture what will happen if I bring it to my classroom! Yikes! Either the kids drop it (most common) bang it or some genius young engineer con mechanic starts figuring out where certain parts go (Arrrg!)
.
Anyway, little did I know that when I mentioned to him about our “Fun with Photos,” he got excited and it has galvanized him to get me a digital SLR that is ON SALE and I mean a steal! He read from one of his photography forums about this camera store that is closing –Ritz Camera- going out of business. The one he got for me was sold at 50% off! The best part is, it is exactly like the one he has which am a bit familiar with, except mine is smaller and LIGHTER (how’d they do that, I’ll never know!) Lighter translates to “heaven” for my tiny stature! Yipeee!
.
my concept of his and her camera (hehe)
.
Funny thing is, if you ask me what I know about digital SLR –nothing (yet!) except to shoot. I am really excited to get acquainted with my new machine! It’s an Olympus Evolt E-410 (like I know what that means, hehe) I just copied the name from the box (lol)
.
Things are falling into place. As I type, Doods and I are on our way to a picnic with friends. Ate Excem has invited us to Brazos Bend State Park for a bbq. The weather is looking good and my new SLR is begging to be out (hihi)…
.
Photo geek (to-be) on the way. . . Brazos Bend State Park here I come
.
While waiting in between the battery of tests I need to complete (6 that day -April 16) I played with Doods’s DSLR. This shot was taken from a distance -Doods was fascinated by a squirrel who was picking up acorns and burying it just anywhere!
.
Funny squirrel who gathers acorn and bury it anywhere, when I came near, it covered the spot (in a spread-eagle position) where he buried his acorn.
.
Purple and gold Iris -petals torn by recent rainfall.
.
♪ ♫ ♪ Raindrops on roses… ♪♫ ♪
.
Thanks, Hon! mwa!
.
.
.
21
May
Teachers at the Ballpark
.
This is an overdue blog, I almost forgot about it until I received several photos from Brent Broussard, Houston Astros Youth Group Coordinator.
.
Two Fridays ago, I was caught up in a hectic day -to say the least- First, I took four of my boys to another school for the district-wide Reading Rodeo. After which, we returned to a school that was generally festive. Friday was the culmination of the Teachers’ Appreciation Week -free lunch (shrimp and fish –yum!) treats and gifts, raffle draws, games, etc. Instead of the usual 3PM, we had to leave a bit later than usual for the “Deal or No Deal” game. I did not win anything *grins* but Poorva, my carpool buddy, pulled out a fifty! ($50 -Yey for her!)
.
As part of Teachers’ Appreciation Week, the Region 4 District Teachers of the Year for 2008-2009– in which I am one of —were treated to a baseball game. Click HERE to read more.
.
At the Minute Maid Park with Che and Max (Doods is the photographer)
.
Junction Jack -Astros’s mascot
.
I met another Filipino teacher –Michael. He was right behind me in the line. He is also the District Teacher of the Year in their district (Galena Park ISD). Mabuhay ang Pinoy!
.
Teachers of the Year lining up to shake hands with Junction Jack (macot)
.
.
.
.
20
May
We Need “Change!”
.
This ranting and raving is inspired by a thunderous blog from one of my blogging buddies, Engtot (a.k.a. Kuracha). You are right, girlfriend, writing is a good outlet! It’s a stress-buster and best of all, it’s FREE! Teehee. . .
.
Last Monday, while inquiring with one of the cafeteria staff about a lost “change” – the quiet inquiry turned into a nasty confrontation. I came and inquired with every intention of settling a small issue and getting back to my classroom. . .
.
Here’s the thing, last Friday, one of my students gave $5.00 to one of the cafeteria staff and got 2 bags of chips at 50 cents each and NO change. The kid, let’s call him Max (not his real name) did not tell me about this incident on the day it happened. Come Monday, I had a letter from the mom explaining what happened and apparently soliciting assistance to retrieve the missing $4.00. But the letter was written in . . . er. . . Spanish! Nevertheless, Max though not the most verbose kid in my class was at least capable of telling me what the letter says, so explain he did.Before I continue, let me say that this is not an isolated case, this is common (kids not getting the correct change) which makes it exasperating for me! It is like “immature” adults playing a game of …”let’s keep doing it, if we’re caught, we’ll tell!” I hate to think it’s all about “cheating on the kids,” but that is what it appears to be! Wouldn’t that get to you?!
.
.
Sadly, teachers do not go with the kids to the cafeteria, it is our break time and there are lunch monitors who look after the students during lunch time. There has never been a single day that I fail to remind the kids (and their parents) not to carry huge bills in school. My kids can count change from a dollar or two, but huge bills have a tendency to confuse them.
.
Anyway, I took Max and marched to the cafeteria –this means depositing my students at somebody else’s classroom so that I do not have to leave them unsupervised! Huge hassle right? Oh well, Max and I proceeded to the cafeteria expecting that all this will be over in a snap. Normally, the cafeteria people would apologize and say there are too many kids and they got er.. “confused”and must’ve handed the change to the wrong child…(whatever!) and I would leave with the “unturned” change. That day (oh gosh), the “crazy” cafeteria lady (who turned out to be mean too) has a lot to say, she was even in a confrontational mood. She said: how do you know what the letter says, it is in Spanish!” …like duh, my studend can talk! “Why didn’t you tell me about it last Friday?” “I can’t remember this boy” I experienced impotent rage and I saw RED! Grrr! MY kid is only 6 years old and has NO reason to lie! Externally, I held my breath and exclaimed with a smile (internally I was fuming!)
.
“Oh ok, well, I’ll just elevate the case to the assistant principal and SUMMON Max’s mom so she can explain to an interpreter about the “missing change,” maybe then you will get a CLEARER picture of what this letter is trying to say and er it might help jog your memory about Friday’s incident.”
.
I was about to walk away with Max, when what I said seemed to hit the cafeteria lady because she hurriedly punched a button that sent the drawer of her cash register sliding. With a dagger look and an ugly pout, she dumped $4.00 at Max’s tiny hand. With a grin, a “Thank you” and a “Have a nice day!” I strutted away with a beaming Max who is $4.00 richer that day! If not for Max’s gleeful smile, that confrontation would have ruined my mood completely! *Grrr and a sigh*
.
Now to set the record straight, not all cafeteria personnel are like that “mean” lady, a lot of them are nice (to the teachers and to the kids as well). I even attended a funeral when the mom of one of the cafeteria staff -my friend, Ms Patricia- passed away. Ms Patricia always greets me with a smile and puts extra cheese in my spaghetti bowl. (She say I look like her son’s girlfriend -hehe!)
.
Oh well, our school needs a CHANGE in the cafeteria staffing to ensure that our students get their accurate “change.” Yes, we need change!
.
.
I agree, Engtot, writing is indeed therapeutic, I’m glad for a chance to air out sentiments -minor or otherwise. . .
.
.
09
May
Clean and Green
.
Yesterday, four boys from my class, and I, took home a trophy. Yes, we bagged the district-wide FIRST PLACE award in the Reading Rodeo held at Thurgood Marshall School, one of the schools in our district.
.
We won first place in Dramatic Reading, Kindergarten division. Click HERE to read more.
.
Keegan Jenkins, Trevion Johnson, Jeremi Orange, Alexander Peristeris and Ms Bernal
.
I bought four black shirts and painted it with nature theme. Sea –stop water pollution/conserve water. Clouds –clean air (can’t find any easier design for this)
.
Sun –awareness of the need to protect our ozone layer. Tree –save the trees- recycle
.
Walking down the “red line” to receive their trophy. This is their closest experience of a “red carpet” (teehee)
.
Now, “Clean and Green” is no longer just a coloring page that these kids color, it is an experience that they and I will carry for the rest of our lives.
.
.
.
.
.
.
03
May
Pound for Pound Fight!
.
Yeap, Manny Pacquiao did it again. It was a knock out. British opponent Ricky Hatton was knocked out before the bell resounded to signal the third round. It was a blow by blow by Manny, sending Hatton sprawled twice during the first round and giving him a powerful left hook –known to be Pacquiao’s best weapon- towards the end of the second round, which knocked the British cold. Hatton fell like a sack of potatoes –flat on his back. Cheering erupted everywhere at MGM Garden, but was momentarily replaced by concern when Hatton’s eyes seemingly rolled back. It took awhile before the Manchester fellow was able to stand without being aided. Click HERE to read more
.
Busy spicing up the crawfish
.
A small portion of our 35-pound crawfish
.
Let the feast begin!
.
Working on my crawfish (”Get that camera off my face! Yikes”)
.
The weather cooperated, it was fairly cool -breezy.
.
Max, get off that chair! Hahaha!
.
Domino Train (see the little trains?)
.
Mahjong on the next table
.
True Lies on TV! Talk about multi-tasking!
.
Doods and Chard re-enacting the highlights of the Pacquiao-Hatton event and chaos breaks out!
.
.
.
25
Apr
I Am Involved
.
“One is not born into the world to do everything but to do something…” – Henry David Thoreau, poet, writer, philosopher
.
Last Sunday marked the end of the six-week think-about-it period that the research team in MD Anderson gave me to come up with a decision on whether or not I will agree to be part of a research that aims to learn if taking Letrozole after a hysterectomy (surgical removal of the uterus) for uterine leiomyosarcoma will delay or prevent the cancer from coming back. Letrozole is an estrogen blocker. It blocks estrogen which some types of cancer feed on. Some Leiomyosarcoma (the type of cancer I HAD) feed on estrogen, some don’t, thus the clinical trial.
.
“If you are found to be eligible to take part in this study, you will be randomly assigned (as in the toss of a coin) to 1 of 2 groups. Group 1 will receive letrozole by mouth once a day. Group 2 will receive no treatment. Both groups will be followed closely every 3 months. You will have an equal chance of being placed in either group.” –MD Anderson
.
Last Sunday, I gave them my unquestionable YES. I am happy to be of service, especially since Leiomyosarcoma is really RARE! Right now, out of the 80 that they expect to have, there are only 8 of us who are taking part in this research. I am the 8th!
.
As explained, we will be randomized (as in a toss of a coin) as to which arm we will be under. I was randomized to be in Group 2 (yikes!) not at all what I was hoping for. Group 2 is the OBSERVATION group. We will NOT take Letrozole, but will be closely monitored as everyone else who is part of this research.
.
There are five of us in group 2 and three in Group 1. Of the three people who are taking Letrozole, NONE experienced recurrence. In our group –not taking anything, but being closely monitored- two out of five had progression (the term they use when the disease recurs) I WAS happy with my YES, but the details shared to us from the research scared the living daylights out of me! No details are divulged until after you are part of the research.
.
There is a choice to pull-out of research and insist that the oncologists prescribe that I take Letrozole. Letrozole is already being prescribed to some breast cancer patients who have had cancer that is proven to be feeding on estrogen (not all types of cancer feed on estrogen). But for my case (leiomyosarcoma), it is STILL under clinical trial –it’s experimental. I was deliberating on insisting that Dr. Wolf prescribe Letrozole for me, but that would mean pulling-out from research, which will also mean one less person (that they badly need) in the research.
.
After deliberating for almost a week, I have decided to just get INVOLVED! The battle has just begun and I will fight my way through it.
.
Good nutrition is a powerful weapon, but not an easy one with the type of lifestyle we live. This battle will be difficult for me because Doods and I do not (YET) have the habit of discriminating between whole food and processed food. Sadly, we patronize fast-foods a lot (at least one meal a day). After work when we are both too tired (or sometimes, just plain lazy) to cook, we just grab something (normally from a fast food) or order a take-out from any one of our favorite restos or sometimes, just eat in that resto.
.
Miso Salmon with Soba Noodles topped with Pa Muchim (Scallion Salad)
Now, at least this one falls under “good eats” YUM!
.
Working out is another weapon I can yield to. I haven’t started anything yet since after the surgery, but last Tuesday when I met with Dr. Wolf, she gave me the go-signal to start doing any normal activity a normal person does. Doods is excited to set the treadmill back. I hope (whew!) I can do this diligently –baby steps, nothing grand (yet)
.
INVOLVEMENT means giving and not just taking. Getting involved is NOT easy –it spells out difficulty and complication. I realized there is a whole lot I need to learn and DO to be able to keep ahead of this game that (if not careful) might cost me my life. I AM INVOLVED; I chose to be when I signify to be a participant of the research. I am involved because I have decided to do my best to live a healthier lifestyle –which to those who know me- know it won’t be easy (I’m a food junkie) I really wish I can remain this way. I can shrug my shoulder and walk away and continue with what I have been comfortably doing come hell or high water… come cancer, but I have decided to fight. My heart is heavy as I type… this is not such a pleasant blog to write. I can see my days ahead… gloomy without my chips and mozzarella sticks *sigh* somebody stop me from crying! *sob* This type of healthy lifestyle might be easy for some -they are lucky- my dear friend, Poorva, is a vegetarian since birth (cool! I even learned a good way to make tea from her) She’s born and raised that way, it’s second nature to her, but not to me (though am not going vegetarian yet, just semi…) to me this is a battle *sigh with a smile*
.
In the end, the only consolations I have are Doods and a bunch of supportive friends. I’ll take this chance to thank ESA (my nutrition guru). She believed in me and has never given up even when I remain passive whenever she is talking to me about good nutrition. This is another blog altogether (teehee)
.
I need all the support I can get right now because I have decided to get involved and made up my mind to LIVE.
.
Done typing. Am now off to my friend, Che’s, house for a Domino challenge! In one of our parties, we discovered a cool game called “Domino Train.” It’s fun!
.
.
.
.
Here’s a quick (and funny) post. Last Wednesday, the Kindergarten students in our school had their Easter Egg Hunt. Our grade level was assigned to do ours on Wednesday because the other grade levels will have to do theirs on Thursday and school was to be closed on Black Friday.
.
Some very supportive parent-volunteers helped out by stuffing the eggs with candies and did the “hiding” of the eggs for the hunt. My students on the other hand, worked on their Easter egg basket. We used brown bag and they decorated it with colorful Easter egg cut-outs, I helped them attach a construction paper to serve as the basket handle.
.
The actual hunt was a blast! It did not take long. In the span 30 minutes it was over. The yard was cleaned up of every colorful egg that decorated it just minutes earlier. The yard was small and the kids were fast (and excited!). Everybody came back to the classroom happy. As always on park days, the kids brought grass and tumble-weeds back to the classroom with them (thank God no flower-picking since they were all busy with the hunt). Mr. Mike our janitor is use to the mess by now. I prepared the usual cookie treat –suppose to be their favorite (after every park day), but not that day! What with all those candies they collected from the hunt. Whoa… too much sweets! Hyper-alert!
.
Anyway, as they were splitting the plastic eggs open, one of my “smarties” called out to me and asked “Teacher, why are we hunting eggs? The Easter bunny doesn’t lay eggs, right? It shouldn’t be Easter bunny, it’s suppose to be Easter Chicken!” Hahaha… kids and their power of deduction! Good one, Denise!
.
I always capitalize on moments like these, very good spring board for discussion, and discussed we did.
.
Happy Easter Everyone!
.
.
.
29
Mar
A Love Affair Is Over
.
.
It’s Sunday morning and I sit here in bed pounding on the keys, simultaneously checking on Doods as he snores in his sleep! Yes, he does! Who knows, perhaps I do too! Yikes! Oh well, I’ll get up after this quick blog and make “unnecessary” noise to stir him up (bad!) Hahaha! Kissing would do the trick, but I don’t want him to accuse me of waking him up on purpose (like I wouldn’t! Hehe). I can’t help it, I like sitting WITH him at breakfast! Weekend breakfast is special, not just because it’s not harried and we get to talk leisurely; I also get to prepare breakfast for Doods which I seldom get to do because we eat breakfast at the workplace (if not in the car). This thought brought my mind to coffee which I will be making for him. . .
.
Nine months ago (June 2008), I was diagnosed with severe iron deficiency anemia and had to undergo iron-therapy. The doctor forbade me from taking caffeine (it slows down the absorption of iron), I was disheartened. I am fond of drinking coffee. Our fridge never runs out of the bottled Starbucks Mocha Frappuccino which I would quickly grab every morning for breakfast. I am also a “regular” at the teacher’s lounge where everyone gathers for coffee break and a chat.
.
I had difficulty saying NO to coffee! I literally suffered withdrawal syndrome. I had headaches and my taste buds acted up like it was protesting! I had strange “unscheduled” cravings. By unscheduled I mean even when it’s not meal time or snack time (out of the blue) I would feel like gobbling up cake or pie (which in normal circumstances would be accompanied by coffee). It was coffee’s way of saying “hello, I am HERE!” Separation anxiety big time! My separation with coffee took an awful toll on me. Coffee and I were like lovers forcibly separated and fighting to find our way back! I cheated every chance I get and boy did it feel good! It took awhile before I was able to finally stop for good. With the help of friends and Doods’s support, I was able to slowly get over it. For awhile during the difficult days Doods joined me and literally stopped drinking (at home) as well, because whenever he brews, I smell… and have no choice but take a sip… and finally drink!
.
I had no choice but to stop. I was under time pressure then. Until I get better from my anemia (which means NO coffee) I cannot undergo my much-needed surgery. I was forced to end my rendezvous with coffee. At the back of my mind, I was hoping that I can resume where I left off after the surgery. The chain of events in this life led me to realize it’s over as far as coffee is concerned. My recent diet for cancer-prevention forbids caffeine big time! Coffee and I can NEVER resume where we left off, but we have become good friends. I still drink but very seldom (once a month or at times none at all) I say hello to coffee but have lost the cravings. I never thought the day would come when I can brew coffee and not drink, but it did! I am grateful that the difficult phase is over. Now, I save my coffee days when my girlfriends and I would hang out at cafes. I am there for the company and if they serve Venti Mint Mocha Chip Frappuccino Blended Coffee, I’ll have some but otherwise hot chocolate with thick cream would be equally appreciated.
.
I guess this is just one of the many things I get the privilege to “enjoy” (hehe) by being in the Potter’s wheel. . . (sigh with a smile)
.
Now, am posting this quick blog and will be making noise around here so Doods will stir and wake up in time to enjoy his cup of “still-steaming-hot” coffee. *winks*
.
To my dear friend Kuracha, I am with you every step of the way, girlfriend! Love you lots!
.
.
.
March 19, 2009
.
.
Three years ago on this same day, March 19, I posted my first blog here at friendster.
.
There is great happiness in letting myself write. I don’t always do it well, or need to, but I do need to do it! As writers -amateurs and professionals alike- there is always that natural longing to name our emotions and preserve it through writing. I simply give in to my yearning and pound on my keyboard and passionately start naming my emotions, my experiences, and my world. The yearning to preserve these memories is so primitive it does not even require readership, it’s just begging to be written, period.
.
I am not inhibited to writing. My friend, Esa, and I have been fond of journals. I know a lot of people who are too. What I was inhibited to –at that time, three years ago- was sending my thoughts out in the blogosphere -through this online web log (blog for short). I was hesitant to share my thoughts in public, I usually rely on email –which I am fond of- but I realized there is a better way, an easier way to share my thoughts with friends and family -blog. It is as easy as sharing photos through various sharewares. When updating friends and family on my happenstance, I don’t need to email it many times to different people, it is posted on one spot –my then quiet nook- called blog page, ever bashful of visitors yet always available should friends and family wish to see it. So blog I did.
.
Afterward, it was just pure, unadulterated joy of writing. Readership or none, writing for the pleasure of writing just got addicting! Spilling my thoughts to the Universe feels good. Pounding on my keyboard allows me to rant and rave at the Universe, spilling my guts about the things that makes me happy and the things that are making me fearful; I was able to share my hopes and my dreams; my reflections and my resolutions; my apprehensions and my heartaches; my triumphs and my defeats. It is liberating to shoot all these to the Universe and to MYSELF! As I pound on the keys, I clear my thoughts and am literally rearranging life itself.
.
Writing is both psychological as well as physical. It expands the muscles of my mind and the veins of my brain. It allows me to touch base with my inner self.
.
But things got better. I would have been contented to just write, period. But lo and behold all the pounding in my keyboard stirred the blogosphere and the Universe responded. I was able to connect with other souls who also experience pleasure in writing. This meeting of minds opened avenues for exchanging of thoughts that continue to cultivate my writing life up to this day.
.
“If you build it, they will come” –Field of Dreams (movie)
I did. I built and they came and some continue to come. I have no idea what I was venturing into when I opened my life to this thing called blogging. Little by little, the puzzle pieces are coming together now. The existence of my blog page has evolved. It is no longer a quiet nook where I spill my guts; it is now a field of dreams for me and the people who continue to decorate my blog page. A field where I, together with my friends (nearby and online alike) come together to share thoughts and in the process enrich each others lives.
.
To my blogging buddies in Salitype, join me friends, as I celebrate the birth date of my field of dreams, my blog page! Cheers!
.
Happy Birthday, TES’timony! May you have many more blogging years to come! (be it in friendster or elsewhere…)
.
.
.
09
Mar
Meals on Wheels
.
Today, Late-afternoon-Monday, as I work tediously in my craft room (completing unfinished projects) the noise of my growling tummy rises above the sound of my printer and cricut machine combined. Since my tummy and I have been together since birth, I can understand perfectly well what it’s trying to say! “What’s for dinner?” it keeps chanting louder and louder. On a more primitive translation: “I am hungry!” Indeed I wonder what’s for dinner… Since after the surgery, our meals have been a surprise to both Doods and me.
.
Having heard about our latest ordeal (my surgery), Caroline, the head of the Math Department in Doods’s school, has spearheaded a sort-of meals-on-wheels program. The program solicited volunteers to cook and bring us meals. When Doods first told me about it, I had no clue how this will be carried out, that on top of feeling a bit awkward. Am not one to bother people. I was uncomfortable and I felt it would be burdensome (to his busy co-teachers). We did well during my initial surgery, so I don’t see how the second one would be different. Doods feels the same way. But after his co-teachers eagerly signed in, some even approached him to inquire about his favorite dish; he lost the guts to turn them down. He and I are not yet well-versed with the culture here, so we gave in.
.
Monday, last week, their principal, Jennifer, came to the house and went as far as my craft room (upstairs), shook my hands and made pleasant conversation. She’s white, thirtyish, and a friendly lady. She brought us Enchilada with dirty rice (style of cooking rice) and baked beans -combination was really good and it also came with lotsa cheese. The rest of the week, they just handed the meals to Doods (in school) I never got the chance to meet them.
Here’s the rest of the menu:
Tuesday: Baked chicken (with stuffing) plus rice, pasta and broccoli (from Charlotte)
Wednesday: Wild rice with peas and Sautéed shrimp in a garlic olive oil sauce (I typed these as written in Nancy’s card)
Thursday: Baked (crunchy) chicken with pasta and veggies (from Teresa)
Friday: Pasta in marinara sauce (from Richard)
.
I am in awe at the thoughtfulness shown by these generous souls. I do not know anyone of these people, which magnifies their kind act. I enjoy reading stories like these from “Chicken Soup for the Soul” or “Chocolate for a Woman’s Heart,” but never thought I’d write one from experience.
.
To our friends who came to visit; sent cards, balloons, flowers, postcards; called; texted and showed care in many other wonderful and thoughtful ways, we have not over-looked your kindness; we are truly grateful. In many ways, you too are also part of this blog.
.
This blog has nothing to do with me. These people are the heroes of this entry. Acts like these strengthen my faith in humanity! I decided to write this entry to remind myself, that in times when people’s insensitivity and tactless acts dishearten me and makes me cower in the shadow of cynicism, I can look back and remember… and know that the world is STILL a wonderful place because of the existence of thoughtful souls like these.
.
Today, Monday, I have no clue what’s for dinner. I do not know what surprise awaits us. But I know it would be good. The best surprise lies in knowing another kind and generous soul who I might not meet, but am sure “I will experience” through this “meals-on-wheels.”
.
Wednesday’s meal came with this card. A touch of Nancy’s creativity.
.
.
.
28
Feb
In the Potter’s Wheel
.
Yes, the Potter’s wheel. The clay spins and spins painfully while the Potter molds and chips-off humps and flatten lumps, and if that isn’t enough, it stops and the potter moves the dizzy clay in a burning furnace where the formed clay will be baked in unbearably painful heat. Before all these painful procedure, the unsuspecting clay is kneaded, yes, squeezed, pushed, pulled, pounded, till it is soft enough to mold…
.
My husband, Doods, and I, applied for a teaching position in America some six years past. Never mind what grade level, we thought; after all, beggars can’t be choosers. But with some strange aim at luck, we both got the job, as if that’s not enough we were placed in grade levels we have been comfortably teaching –he in high school and I in kindergarten. Life was good. Add to these blessings the fact that we are in a place where the work load is light and pay is good enough to allow us to live in relative comfort. It is either that or we are just easy to please. I hope it is the latter. It is a place where we envision ourselves growing old together. Where our days would be filled with laughter and good conversation shared with good friends. A homey, comfortable place where the word ‘stress’ doesn’t always pop up. A year after our arrival here in America, in 2004, we bought a house and quickly worked on converting it to a home for us and for friends alike. Things were looking up. We were living in relative comfort among good friends, just as we planned. Just as we imagined. Nothing grand. Just a simple, productive life. But little did we know there is more to this life.
.
This clay has been chosen. The Potter has set His eyes and this complacent clay sitting quietly in the corner is now set apart and is being kneaded, pulled, pushed, pounded and placed in the Potter’s wheel.
.
In a bizarre twist of fate, in the summer of 2008, I discovered I have a six-pound fibroid and had to undergo a major surgery to have it removed. It was also at that time that I found out I had iron deficiency anemia and had to wait until I am considered “fit for surgery” to be able to have the humongous fibroid removed. The bumpy EMOTIONAL roller coaster ride is heating up and is just about to take off (and it has a long way to go). After five months of iron therapy, in November 2008, I was physically ready to undergo myomectomy and so I did. Once again life was looking up. Our doctor who happens to be an OB Gyn did a good job in removing the huge fibroid and because she is pro-life, took time to clean my uterus and tubes. So should we choose to, Doods and I can start a family. With pride, she declared, everything is well and in a year or so after the incision has properly healed, I will be able to carry a child. We were childless by choice for twelve years. It was a decision we made and have been happy with. After the surgery, in one of our reflections, God is calling us to start a family. God is a God of second chances. Since my uterus has been spared, the situation led us to make a decision that as soon as I am physically ready we will try to have a child.
.
But the Potter has other plans. The kneading doesn’t stop there. In a span of three weeks, after receiving all the good news, we found out the six-pound menace is actually cancer and not fibroid as suspected. It felt as if our world fell apart. Despite the strength of our relationship with God, we felt, there was something that we can’t completely read into. But all it calls for is faith. We trust God and He has our confidence.
.
To Doods and me it was a test of faith. Faith that makes us believe that God knows what is best. In His time, He will make things beautiful. Faith that allows me to acknowledge that, I must NEED this or I wouldn’t be here. God knows my potential and He wouldn’t stop until he has brought out the best in me. If I am not careful, I will miss the reason for being in this situation.
.
To say I am trapped in a giant EMOTIONAL roller coaster zooming at full speed is an understatement. It is not just ups and downs; there are loops and dark tunnels too.
.
December 16, 2008, we found out I have cancer. To what extent, nobody can tell, not until we find an oncologist who can best treat this rare type that I have –Leiomyosarcoma. The rarity of the type of cancer I have plus the winter festivities (offices were closed) rendered us crippled from rushing things. It took us about three long weeks to finally come face to face with an oncologist . On January 6, 2009 (our first appointment) Doods and I met with Dr. Wolf and she diligently scheduled me to undergo a battery of tests. It was also on this day that we found out our desire to have a child will not be made possible because the type of cancer I have feeds on hormones and therefore there is an urgency to remove my ovaries (source of hormones). My uterus has to be taken out as well because it is where the six-pound cancer has been removed.
.
After the series of rigid tests, we met with Dr. Wolf for the much anticipated results. Verdict: Negative of Leiyomysarcoma. There was no more cancer left from the six-pound that has been removed. A reason to jump for joy. Once again the emotional roller coaster is back on track! Joyful and grateful.
.
As if the roller coaster ride is not enough to add thrill to this otherwise lack-luster life, we were introduced to IVF (In vitro fertilization). And a blessing in the form of my sister, Ima, stepped in. She volunteered to be the surrogate mom. Wow, another reason to be ecstatic. But our insurance denied us coverage, another set-down. But we have already seen God’s hand at work, so we forged on with courage and determination. After two weeks, the IVF procedure was a success. We reached as far as cryopreservation stage. The implanting will not take place until August 2009 when my sister who will do the surrogacy will be available for the procedure.
.
And the Potter continues to knead, pull, push and punch and what’s next? The Potter’s wheel? I guess.
.
Who has ever heard of two consecutive major surgeries in an interval of three months? Who wants to be sliced in the exact same incision? Who else would be fortunate, but me. (*sigh* teehee)
.
And the wheel spins and spins and spins in a dizzying state of the unknown. One thing alone makes me stay on the wheel. I know my Potter wants what’s best. I know that when He is done, I will shine and I will cease to be a mere clay. I will be a masterpiece. Does it hurt? Yes! Is it uncomfortable? Yes! Enthusiasm is gone. Desire is distant. Responsibility is overwhelming! But I try very hard to stay focused. I know that He knows what He is doing. He knows just the right amount of pressure to apply. Only His hands can feel the lumps. The bumps that are the deformities of my soul, the flaws of my character. As long as I have it, I am willing to stay in the Potter’s wheel.
.
The Potter’s wheel is not to be avoided; it’s to be experienced. Although the tunnel is dark, it does go through the mountain. The Potter’s wheel reminds me of who I am and who God is. I shouldn’t try to escape it. To escape it could be to escape God.
.
God sees my life from beginning to end. He may lead me through a storm at age thirty so I can endure a hurricane at age sixty. An instrument is useful only if it’s in the right shape. A dull ax or bent screwdriver needs attention, and so do we. A good potter keeps his vessel in shape. So does God.
.
Should God place you on his potter’s wheel, be thankful. It means he thinks you’re still worth molding and spinning and baking…
.
It is up to us to work with God. In the Potter’s wheel, my character is being developed, my mind is being refined and my heart is being purified.
.
My latest surgery went well. Three oncologists performed the surgery; checked my internal organs, intestines and wherever else cancer cells are likely to hide and claimed they have NOT seen any. At any rate, nothing seen by our naked eye. I consider it wonderful news. But the roller coaster called life will not be complete, the doctors also spoke about the possibility of this type of cancer, recurring. The oncologists said I will be subjected to a thorough observation for the span of two years (CT scan every three months) at which point this type of cancer is likely to recur and after which a CT scan every six months for three years and then reduced to once a year after the initial five years.
.
Life is unpredictable. There is success and there is failure. We make plans and we try to live the best way we know how and sometimes, we take life at its face value. But Doods and I realized the wonderful news is that the best way we know how is NOT yet the best way. There are still unexpectedly wonderful things that await those of us who are willing to be subjected to the Potter’s wheel.
.
As for Doods and me, we have decided to quit losing our peace and be quick to work with God. To stay PLIANT in our attitude towards life. In this adventuresome ride in the Potter’s wheel, we will become a vessel for God’s higher purpose. A vessel of honor. And bask in this God given destiny. When Doods and I held hands and stood before the Lord, we were able to accept that the Potter’s wheel is not the end, but just the beginning of the process. We know we will be placed in the furnace, a burning furnace, where we will know the pain of being purified. When baked we will be painted and after wards glazed or whatever else God has in stored for His creation -His masterpiece. But so be it, Lord. Bake us to perfection. Keep changing us, little by little, glory by glory. Make more out of this life, Lord. A higher purpose to this life and a deeper meaning to this existence.
.
Doods and I made our decision and are willing to stay in the Potter’s wheel.
.
“For a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith -of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire -may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.”
1 Peter 1:6-7
.
.
.
.
.
16
Feb
Foot Feast
.
This Foot Feast blog is really just an overshoot of a previous blog –tagged! I was just trying to arrange these shoes so I can take a quick photo to garnish my posting titled tagged, when I came face to face with how much shoes I have. It turned out a lot, so I made this separate blog instead of crowding the other blog.
.
I color-code my shoes (no explanation needed) These are the high heels -mostly open-toed
.
closed shoes - mixed winter wear
.
Rubber shoes, flip flops and such
.
One of the things that fascinated me about the whole tag thing was realizing how much footwear I have accumulated. What does this mean in the greater scheme of things? Hmmm… I wonder!
.
What’s with all these footwear?! It must be my Imeldific Syndrome (if there is such a thing!) Thank God I don’t have the liberty or resources to acquire 3,000 pairs of shoes like Imelda Marcos. Nevertheless, I hope my case is still normal (seems that way at any rate). I am sure am not the only female who is fascinated with shoes or the shoe business would be dwindling now. Is this psychological? I really have NO clue! I hope not!
.
I scrutinized the footwear issue. Tried to analyze where all these came from. Why I have a lot. Wherever did all of these come from anyway? The thing is, I realized there are a lot of them because they DON’T get worn out -no kidding- there are too many of them to be worn even once in a week. With less pair, they get really worn out quickly. So in principle, I think they accumulate because they don’t get worn out. Does that make sense? I hope so. Truth is, this year, I haven’t bought a single pair. And even last year, I didn’t buy that much, what with all the anemia thingy and surgery going on. I realized, most of these are old pairs that have been nicely kept. The really old ones would date back some six years ago –and would still look good because there are alternates and so they don’t get so worn out. For the record, there’s one there that dates back 12 years ago –my wedding shoes– hahaha! See if you can spot it!
.
Yes, I wear them all. Some more often than the others, of course. At the end of every season, I clean and keep them nicely boxed. My favorite season is spring and summer. You can guess why. I love colors –whether on shoes, clothes, bags…anything! You can tell from my craft room.
.
Thank God, our feet don’t change much unlike our waist line! There is no way, I can adjust any of these pairs. Hahaha! 
.
Am not proving anything with this post, on the more honest contention, even I fascinate myself sometimes. After seeing ALL these shoes in photo all lined up (I don’t get to see it this way, they are in separate different racks) I have to admit the first thing I said to Doods was “I guess this means I wouldn’t be buying shoes this year!” He looks skeptical, but am positive I won’t… :D if I can help it! I better start sacking some of these for Goodwill. 
.
For all it’s worth all the lining up for picture taking gave me an opportunity to clean our closet -vacuuming and dusting off! (teehee) 
.
.
.
.
I thought I would be too busy to blog, what with a birthday post on top of the latest craze in blogging –being tagged! But I cannot let this opportunity pass up. I have had several of these in my 16 years of teaching, so I decided to just go for this one. Get down and blog!
.
If you’re a teacher you would know what I mean by Valentine’s Day presents! “Lots of them” do not begin to describe the amount of gifts we (teachers) receive, especially with former students adding to the list of well-wishers. Of course, am talking about simple tokens, nothing extravagant, just kids wanting to give something to their teacher. Anything “Valentiney” –from worded hearts (those colored candy hearts with words) to heart-shaped balloons, flowers -roses mostly, both fake and real, chocolates (in heart-shaped boxes) tops the list, Teddy bears (lots enough to put up a bear store) Ok, having enumerated all these, truth is, the fun part is not being at the receiving end of all these “gifts”, but the power to make a giver happy. In truth it’s really the kids that feel “delight” in giving. If you want my honest opinion, after 16 years of these (in the Philippines it’s even worst) I would rather not receive a thing, it’s a huge waste of resources. Am not being cynical, just being practical!I don’t even like those types of chocolates and flower is really expensive during Valentine week!
.
Like what I said, just stop and look at the face of the giver…and wow! The reaction will blow you away! The only time I see a notorious kid in class behave, is when he/she has a gift in his/her hand! Their bashful smile says it all! One of my very verbose students was even tongue-tied in handing me a bag with a bear. Geez, can you please be this shy (and quiet) when am doing discussion in class! Hahaha Cynic alert! Cynic alert! In all fairness, I do make a fuss when I receive something. The kids love it when I do the big eyes and do an exaggerated WOW with my mouth gaping…w-o-w! That makes their day….and THEIR REACTION completes mine. Makes me forgiving towards the multi-colored candies made of worded-hearts (yikes!) Hahaha!
.
But here’s the bomb! Last Friday, I was ambushed in the hallway by one of my former students bearing the most unusual gift…a doll, a Barbie doll in apple green gown– what with white hair springing out of me, what is this boy thinking! Plus, when was I seen in green gown (Ok, stop complaining!) The co-teachers that I was standing with, in the hallway (including his adviser) were all so touched that he even remembered to bring me something for my birthday (con Valentine’s Day, con Teacher of the Year) His adviser said, the kid has been harping about this gift for Ms Bernal almost the whole week! Gee-wish! Talk about a buzz!
.
For the record guys, I have never given these kids impression that I dress this way! But I admire the effort and thoughtfulness. The sash completed his image of me as a “Barbie Teacher” (yikes!) Teehee
.
For all it’s worth, the Barbie doll looks so chic despite looking like something out of the cake from my 18th birthday. This is one gift that is screaming with the words “It’s the thought that counts” (Teehee) I don’t know what I’ll do with it, but am secretly pleased for being remembered albeit being embarrassed in the hallway (groans) Am sure that kid won’t read this post anyway (crossing my fingers). I might be good at what I do but am not sentimental about it, in fact, I sometimes think am a bit of a slave-driver with a play for high expectations thrown in! I tried real hard to recall what I did for this kid and all I remember was being at the top of my lungs, because he belonged to an almost all-boys batch. His batch had only 6 girls out of 21 kids!
.
.
But after all is said and done, I felt good… “bashful good.” It’s mostly my girls who remember me and they don’t ambush me on hallways, they come in troves giggling and hugging me and leaving me with paper cards and scribbling among other things! Of which I honestly prefer (than gifts and the like)
.
To Eli Muñoz, we must have had a good relationship kiddo, because I honestly don’t think I deserve a Barbie on my birthday! Teehee! Thank you for remembering… me!
.
The rewards of this profession catch me off guard sometimes. . .
.
This is Eli Muñoz, a former Kindergarten student. He is now in Fourth grade and looking so much different from the overly-active 5-year old kid I use to chase around!
.
Five-year old Eli Muñoz. Photo taken by his Kindergarten teacher, Mrs. Bernal
.
In Eli’s batch, They were mostly boys. Eli Muñoz in yellow shirt -ooh, that face! He was a cute (and very active) five-year old. You can tell by just looking at the photos! Hehe
.
.
.
14
Feb
Tagged!
.
Been tagged! Whew! So even with a what-do-I-write-here reaction, here is a shot at this “pass-it-on/getting-to-know-you-better” list of 25 things about me. I have enjoyed reading what Joanie has written about herself, so am giving this one a chance.
.
The thing is, I already posted my random 25 before I decided to add some photos to spice up the page. Copied what Betchai did with hers! (gaya gaya!) Methinks, it looks cool this way! Thanks Beth!
.
.
1. I am a “mag-mania.” I have countless magazine subscriptions. Sadly, this fuels the ADHD side of me. I suffer from Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder when it comes to magazines. With books, I can sit and be absorbed, with mags, I just flip through the pages and do selective reading and mostly scanning. To date, I have over 15 different subscriptions! I am trying to reform… hmm…
.
Some of the mags, this does not include Doods’ woodwork and photography mags and some education mags. . .
.
2. Love to cook but seldom do! By love, I mean, I know how (plus I can pick up recipes from youtube) and would really enjoy doing it –as in have FUN with it- but doesn’t always do it, unless in ‘that’ rare mood, am otherwise too occupied to be at it. Besides, Doods is into cooking -big time. One of us in the kitchen is enough to feed two! Teehee!
.
3. I AM generally reflective. I have a strange habit (at the end of each day) of mentally going over what transpired that day. Trying to go over a quick check list of things to be thankful for and people to thank. Sounds absurd, but as Socrates puts it “An unexamined life is not worth living.” It might be aspiring too much but, I like to be better than who I was yesterday. As Stephen Covey said in his book “Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” our habits turn into our character… I am my habits.
.
4. I feel I am not fully-dressed without spraying a generous amount of my mild-smelling cologne -Love Spell from Victoria’s Secret. Faithful to it since I discovered it some 4 years ago. Perfumes vary (although Jewel by Alfred Sung and Envy Me by Gucci are my favorites). Yes, I do combine them. The first one is just to ‘please’ the psycho side of me!
.
.
5. I believe in the power of prayer. I get a knack out of talking to God. Yes, I literally do. I can’t say am very prayerful, but with the times that I do pray, I always find solace and it always feels like home. Can’t really say am “very” religious, I just know I love God!
.
6. I am addicted to ASIAN dramas. I do DVD marathons on Korean, Japanese and Taiwanese dramas by myself and with friends. One hot summer, the most number we had was 9 (all of us teachers) and we watched two series of 16 episodes each, non-stop except for restroom breaks and meals (pot luck) Am talking about something like 40 minutes per episode. Yes… marathon in the truest sense of the word!
.
These are some Korean DVD boxed set. My sister, Ima, bought some of these for me some three years ago (from the Philippines). I also discovered some here in Houston in a store in China town.
.
7. Use to drive, but now CAN’T (confusing huh! Hahaha!) Technically, I can. I learned to drive at a young age -14. After a year of driving, I bumped another car big time (New Year’s Eve) and was involved in a drama. I DIDN’T realize right away that I’ve been traumatized; I only accepted it must be trauma when I would break out in sweat every time I am on the driver’s seat. On this, it would have been better if I have NOT yet learned, that’s an easier case. Doods is very encouraging and has been talking me into giving it a shot (again).*Grins*
.
8. I get high on the beach, but am fearful of the “underwater” part of every body of water. I always get strange creepy feelings of unknown creatures coming out to drag me deep down in the dark (this fear that I try to combat came about because of an unpleasant experience in snorkeling) Another Aquarian friend, accused me of giving Aquarians a bad name (hehe), she says we are suppose to be “water creatures” DUH… says who! Well, am trying!
.
9. I collect shoes and bags. If there’s anything, I splurge on these. I consider it an outlet of my self-expression!
I took photos of my shoes, but there are too many, It’ll have to be a completely different blog altogether!
.
10. I try very hard to prioritize on relationships. In every situation and when making decisions that are difficult, prioritizing on relationships has never been a bad choice –might not always work, but it’s always worth giving it a shot. A good philosopher once said, between choices of material wealth, time, prestige, and any other concerns, try to choose “people.” In the end, they are what counts…
.
11. Am into Arts and Crafts. From sewing, scrapbooking, painting, to polymer clay, to decorative wood work, murals…etc. Not that am good at it, that doesn’t really count. I like to surround myself with the things that I created. I did all our curtains downstairs, both on the formals and in the family room.
.
One hot summer, I got bored so I mixed some paint, climbed up the ladder and brought blossoms into my craft room wall through a mural!
.
12. Fond of gardening, but my condition incapacitated me. My garden in Parañaque (Philippines) can boast of providing both shade (trees) and color! I enjoy getting down on my knees and working on dirt. But since coming here in America, the erratic weather in Houston has been an enigma, little by little, I am learning the foliage here. I now know that Petunias go full bloom even during winter.
.
I pulled these weeds out. They were taller than me! One spring break, we just worked in the garden the whole week.
.
13. Enjoys taking photos. I did not use the word photography because unlike Doods, am not good with the technical side of photography, the point-and-shoot camera works for me, it’s lighter. I love taking photos of people and capturing moments. Doods has been convincing me to go for the technical thing as well –methinks I might.
.
14. Belts out anything from Dido, Alanis to that hard English accent in My Fair Lady’s “The rain in Spain stays mainly on the plain.” Love to sing -not that am good at it.
.
15. Plays the piano. Like singing -am not that good- I just enjoy doing it. I play anything from One Republic, Avril Lavigne to those lovable Disney classics. Every time we watch anything Broadway, the first thing I look for is the song book. Of my collection, my favorites are Miss Saigon and Les Miserables.
.
Here are some of my piano books. Of course, I put my two favorites in front (teehee)
.
16. Related to the first two items, is my love for anything Broadway. I got this from my Mom. She is fond of Broadway musicals. To date, I can still sing the songs from sheer memory. My favorite is Miss Saigon. In the Philippines, I secured tickets for the opening month, October, and watched it literally TEN times, at one time, even watched from a box (Yey!). Last month, I saw Spring Awakening (musical) -very hip! I love the songs!
.
Didn’t know what photo to put here, so I took out some tickets from my ticket jar. I collect my tickets in a cute jar topped with a cork.
.
17. I have been a Kindergarten teacher for 15 years. This is my 16th year of teaching. I have never considered it a ‘job’ since I love doing it, it’s a lifestyle. Am not sure if I would have the heart to move to another career, If ever I leave teaching, it would be to write or if we have the means, to travel
.
18. I eat chips (and such) with chopsticks, been doing it for years now -it’s fancy but fun!
.
19. I’m a Capri person. I don’t know why, but I have a strange predilection for capris –all shapes, textures and colors. Although I wear mostly anything.
.
20. I love shopping. Finding good deals get me all hyped up. A steal will bring me to cloud nine. Finding that elusive color of shoes or bag and/or spotting a piece of furniture that fits perfectly in a not-so-regular space, gets me giddy!
.
21. I am GOOD at what I do (Teaching in Kindergarten) *winks*. Excellence is my pursuit. I strive to be the best that I can be, seeking continuous improvement in all that I do. In the business of teaching, there is no such thing as bankruptcy. We are dealing with souls… a life. There are no returns, no exchanges. We have the power to build or ruin a child. I cannot afford to sit back and watch the business collapse. Besides, I must be in this earth for something, might as well be good at it. *huge grin* *kindat*
.
22. Garage sale queen. I find treasures in the most unexpected places. Three years ago, I chanced upon one of my most valued ‘find,’ my piano! A Baldwin -priced at ONLY $700. (brand new of this brand is around $3,000) Mine was in very good condition, slightly used and the keys are soft! It’s a steal! Cool huh!
.
23. I enjoy group games. From serious board games to relays to crazy party games (like musical chair -hehe). Am not competitive, I just like it, it’s fun! Of course, part of the fun includes serious cheering and play-pretend gloating (bwahaha!). Spare me from super-sensitive people and bad losers (so sad!)
.
24. Forgetful but thoughtful. I would forget where I left my purse, but I remember birthdays and special occasions. I also remember the slightest thoughtful gesture friends show me. Is this selective memory? Hehe –dunno.
.
25. Am not fond of watching TV, the commercials waste my time and the interruptions irritate me. I would rather watch 3 movies (or more) in a row (minus the advertisements).
.
Geez, this got lengthier than I wanted it to be. I got so ‘into’ it. Found the activity enjoyable. An attack of Narcissistic syndrome!
.
Like what I always tell my students, none of us are better than the other, we are just created “different.” Individual differences is a gift! The contrasts and/or similarities enrich our existence. For those I tagged, get on to it guys! Allow us to get to know you better.
.
Am tagging: Betchai, Car, Cher, Zen, Rose and Carmen!
.
.
.
.
Today is Tes’s birthday! She has had many types of birthday celebrations before, from quiet family gatherings, to loud and boisterous “surprise” birthday parties, to sappy, sentimental girls’ night-outs, trying real hard to stop the water-works brought about by the tears-inducing conversations that rarely happens on birthdays! (Just kidding girls –hehe) But today is yet another type of celebration, totally way off the mark from the previous ones she had. Today, she celebrated her 38th birthday with a children’s party, and the latter part at home, blissfully blogging… or is that er… “frantically” blogging! Hahaha! Just judge according to her post!
.
Random alert! Random alert! Yes, that was me “up there” trying really hard to type a not-so-serious sounding introduction. Nothing reflective this time, I have done a lot of postings in that line. And this is me HERE trying to get some organization in my thoughts! The thing is, I just WANTED to “quickly” post something today (since it is my birthday –lame, lame, lame! Hahaha! Oh well, I just wanna!). But sadly, my mood is a far cry from being bloggy! I CAN’T write! My blogging center is in shambles and my mind, more so. I am constantly interrupted by text massages and sweet, short phone calls (and some long ones). Don’t get me wrong, am not complaining, both of which I really appreciate of course! (Bring it on! Hehe!) Besides, it isn’t everyday that I get the celebrity treatment. “Thanks to my dear friend Jen, for making that call all the way from Pinas. Love you girl!” *Waving a la beauty pageant candidate, eyes blinking like a 1970’s walking doll*
.
Talk about concentration, Doods and my brother-in-law are chatting in full volume beside me (here and now) as my whole family goes on WWAC (World Wide “Audio” Conference). Blessing of blessings, today is a no-school day in our area in the Philippines, its Parañaque Day! Everyone is home. After the initial “orderly” birthday greetings, (by that I mean everybody politely “taking turns” to greet me) chaos breaks out! Reminiscent of our WWC in Baranggay Salitype –ok, a bit milder (Nothing can beat that one so far). Everybody is on (full blast!) –each one of my nieces have a lot of exciting things to say! Cool, love hearing from them! Marlon (my bro-in-law) exuberantly regaling us with their embassy-experience. Yesterday, they had their interview, and got their H-4 (dependent) visas already. Yey! (Really hilarious tale, by the way) My younger brother insisting on categorizing me under “tanders” (meaning old. Yikes!) So there… now back to my birthday (and hopefully, my blogging). Technically all these happenings are “still” part of MY birthday! Yes, even this typing is part of this B day! Yay!
.
Tonight, am home, supposedly snoring from tiredness, but opted to “quickly” post a blog entry and ended up multi-tasking.
.
Earlier tonight, Doods wanted to dine out in a quiet resto, but my serious warning of potentially falling asleep and slapping my head on my steaming-hot, creamy soup –never mind the main course- quickly dissuaded him from insisting to take me out –poor baby! To show my sincere appreciation for his romantic inclinations, the bouquet of peach roses he gave me is now sitting proudly here amidst the shambles -that resembles my dusty computer table! Tadah! Smells good Hon! Loving it! *Trying NOT to sniff too much, in danger of coughing from dust*
.
.
The week is hectic and that on top of my body-aches from the ER (egg retrieval). Another blog altogether. The painless 30-minute procedure has an after-effect, that they forgot to warn me about. Argh! I was bloated and having body aches (from enlarged ovaries) for five days. Huhuhu! Nuff said! *grins* Mentions this to show where the tiredness originated.
.
Last night, Doods and I busied ourselves with cooking Spaghetti –my simple lunch treat to some friends in school. The tedious part was the goody bags for my 21 students. Yeap, I had to bag all those goodies for the kids, pack everything in my cart and wake up early.
.
Earlier part of yesterday, Che dropped by with a bouquet of fresh pink roses and white daisies and thoughtfully inquired about my aching body -thanks girl, I just had to mention this. Appreciate it!
.
In school today, I celebrated my birthday amongst my 5-year olds. A quick game of musical chair and pass the hat made their day (Yeap, kids!). After gobbling up the cupcakes and cookies, they started to pop the juice box which has caused sticky juice to splatter all over my classroom floor and some on my face and arms (in my attempt to stop them!) Ewe! Grrr! Of course that was simultaneously done with lollipop (which this young generation call “suckers”) dangerously stuck in their mouth. Why ever did I buy them suckers?! Of course, I can’t help but smile when I saw their icing-smudged faces clamoring to make noise through the juice box. Really funny! Some of them even jumped from the top of the table for greater impact. To avoid the loud noise that “might” filter through to the next room (it was really loud), I decided to take them to the park to continue with the juice-box-popping. Thank God for good weather. Turned out to be another classic case of if-you-can’t-beat-them-join-them! That’s what I did! I tried to pop one, and failed embarrassingly – oops, teacher is the weakest link (Robotic voice of the host: GOODBYE!) Hahaha! Why does it look so easy with their tiny feet? Even foot! Ooooh! But I won’t be defeated! After several attempts, I was able to do it, the reverberating “BOOM!” felt good and the applause (Whoa! Authentic childish delight!) like I was the weakest-link-turned-Survivor! Simple victories! Pure joy! Huge energy-loss (sigh -hehe) It was honestly exhilarating! Uh-oh, this could turn into one of my guilty pleasures! I would not hesitate recommending this as a stress-buster. Of course I had to explain to our janitor Mr. Mike what happened to the classroom floor. He was cool about it! Good ‘ol Mr Mike!
.
Got two bags for gifts! Cool! Poorva, my carpool buddy, gave me an artsy, purple Indian bag that I really love. The black bag, a stylish one is from another stylish Indian friend, Anu. I like these bags a lot! They have a character of their own. The bead-work is intricate. The girls sort-of know I’m a bag magnate. I hoard bags of all shapes and sizes (teehee). Poorva and I went to an Indian grocery store to grab something that she can cross-out from her grocery-list and she bought me lotsa treats –Indian snacks- all of which I really like, especially the Papad (crunchy stuff, good with humus).Thank you so much girlfriends!
.
.
When I asked Doods to take me home instead of dining out, I thought I was too tired to do anything, even to write, but guess again… the kids’ unlimited supply of energy must have rubbed off on me! I am still up, simultaneously typing, chatting, sipping tea and endlessly talking on the phone. Another uplifting conversation with a friend who is also traversing the path to parenthood. A conversation I greatly enjoyed and appreciated. It is such a pleasure to discover another traveler on the SAME road. Good company always makes a journey meaningful and worthwhile. Hang in there Pam, we’ll get there girl, together and with God’s grace, we will!
.
The day went well albeit one that is not “spectacular” by worldly standards, but one that has been fun-filled and love-filled. I realized I’m actually 37 turning 5 (hehe) Am technically 38 today and cool about it, especially if I would still be asked to present my ID whenever needed! *wink* So much have happened in my 37 years that makes me proud am 38!
.
On the reflective side (I can’t help it *kindat*) This year opened-up with so many wonderful possibilities and so much, so MUCH to look forward to that figuratively speaking, last night’s nightmares doesn’t even have forms, they are slowly –but definitely- fading away. Things happen for a reason and the GIFT lies not just in the good things that are happening, but in discovering, realizing and coming to terms with the reason… the lesson.
.
The best birthday gift was a phone call I received earlier today, from Jackie, a nurse in FSH, she said three out of six of the fertilized eggs survived and are already SAFE in cryopreservation. Thank you dear Lord! (Er, hang in there strongly guys, we’ll wake you up in August). For now, life goes on!
.
Another year has passed… one that has been full of challenges and lessons learned. We live, we learn. Cheers to a good life! La Dolce Vita!
.
This is one birthday that is far from being blissfully domestic!
.
Tomorrow our school will celebrate an advance Valentine’s celebration. There will be a Red and White dance in the afternoon (thank God, I have lotsa red shirts) The first half of the day will be the exchanging of V cards and goodies. This means the parents are coming over to bring snacks-to-share (pot luck). I need whatever energy I have left because I am sure tomorrow will be ten times more tedious than today and I’m guessing more juice-box-popping instored. Hahaha!
.
.
.
03
Feb
To Be or Not To Be
.
Sometimes in the winds of change we find our true direction.
.
In Vitro Fertilization: IVF is a procedure in which eggs (ova) from a woman’s ovary are removed. They are fertilized with sperm in a laboratory procedure, and then the fertilized egg (embryo) is returned to the woman’s uterus or cryopreserved (frozen) for future use. The first IVF baby, Louise Joy Brown, was born in England in 1978.
.
The whole thing about IVF was mentioned to us by my oncologist some three weeks ago, during our last visit –January 13th (Tuesday) with special attention to cryopreservation. It is an option that we can look into before I undergo hysterectomy. The process involves embryo freezing and storing for future use. The complicated part would be having a surrogate mother carry our baby for nine months. It all sounded surreal and VERY complicated, so Doods and I automatically said NO, thus my surgery was scheduled ASAP for the 30th of January.
.
A couple of days after that visit a spark of interest started growing as Doods and I talked about the possibility of that option. We did a lot of research (technical and logistics) about the procedure. Most importantly we did a lot of soul-searching. For several days we were in reflective mode. We have been through so much this past months and are still reeling from too many intense episodes in our life. We are not sure if we are up for another one (especially one this complicated). There are so many things to consider. We were also under time pressure –my surgery is already scheduled on the 30th. Finally, January 20 (Tuesday), exactly a week after meeting our oncologist and saying NO to IVF, we made a turn-about face and made up our mind to go for it. No rush, just secure an appointment with the fertility experts to get as much information as we can about IVF. We emailed MD Anderson that night and they were quick to respond. A lady from Dr. Wolf’s team, Cathy Burke, called me the next day -January 21 (Wednesday).
.
She referred us to FSH (Fertility Specialists of Houston) and we were able to secure an appointment with them the next day –January 22 (Thursday). Things were happening too fast, that night our minds were going over too many things (too soon), so once again, we freaked out! The day of the appointment, Thursday, we called to cancel and agreed to just let it go (and not even think about it anymore). I was having issues just thinking about the surrogate mom, that person who will carry our child for 9 months! Who will she be? Where will she stay? How well will she take care of our child? Ok, perhaps it is too soon to think about these things, but why start something we might not even WANT to finish. Oh well, we thought that was it. We agreed to drop the whole IVF thing for good.
.
That night while on the phone with my sister, Ima, I casually mentioned to her about our suppose-to-be, already-over concern -–In vitro fertilization (IVF). Her reaction has taken me aback. Just like that, no qualms or fuss, she said, “What about me? I want to do it… I would be happy to do the surrogacy.” My mind goes, er, is she serious? My being Ate (older sister) overcomes my need. Mentally I was shunning away the idea… er, “NO, not you! Don’t get involved, might be risky…” Yet in the deepest recesses of my heart, HOPE such that I have never thought possible started to posses me. I have just told her “As far as IVF is concerned, it’s over!” Doods and I have made up our minds. We were ready to move on. But hope… glorious hope was blooming again and with it came BLISS! I was secretly hoping for a miracle –even when things were looking difficult- and it came in the form of my sister. She urged me to go for it. Thank you so much Ims and Marlon! After putting the phone down, Doods and I opened a topic that we thought has been banned to us.
.
The next day, Friday, we called FSH seeking an appointment (again) with the Fertility experts. They have an available slot that day at 1:30 PM. I did not think twice, I told my assistant principal and she let me go at once. I am also grateful that my Teammates in Kinder (my co-teachers) agreed to keep my students until dismissal time.
.
Finally, a meeting with somebody who can answer almost all our questions. Dr. Chauhan, a reproductive endocrinologist, was very accommodating. On our first meeting, we spilled out our hearts to him –not just technical inquiries- with his help, Doods and I were able to clarify a lot of things about IVF. Dr. Chauhan made it clear that the unbiased data indicate that the chance of success is about 35% (only) for fresh transfer, meaning the fertilized embryo is placed in the uterus of the mom without freezing. In our case, we are limited to surrogate parenting because I cannot keep my uterus long enough to carry a baby. My oncologist wants to take it out ASAP –the risk of Leiyomyosarcoma appearing anywhere on or near the uterus is just too big. Cryopreservation (embryo freezing) is our ONLY option. With cryopreservation, there will be a decrease by 10% from the 35%. The freezing will bring it down to 25%! That 25% is all that we’ve got right now, but it is better than none.
.
Now, we are sort-of over the technical and emotional hurdles of this IVF episode, so we ventured into the logistics part. The procedure is very costly. As if just on cue, the dramatic part of the whole episode kicked in: My insurance DENIED us the IVF procedure! It is NOT part of the policy. Whoa, after all the emotional upheavals that we’ve been through, now this! As if our life isn’t full of drama. We were disconcerted! *sigh* This means making a lot of adjustments on our savings and finances… and a lot of FAITH that God will see us through because we have no intentions of backing out at this point.
.
That fateful day, January 23, we made up our mind and started the procedure. Each cycle of IVF normally takes four to six weeks to complete, but the procedure will have to be shortened for me –the oncologist is not happy with delaying the surgery, the risk is not worth the wait. The wheels of our destiny have been set in a faster motion. I had ultra-sound and blood work done (that day). We need to be back in the clinic after every two days for blood work and ultra-sound. Close monitoring is required so the dosage of the meds can be properly adjusted. The meds (Gonal-F and Menopur) are taken daily with a syringe. Yes, the nasty truth –the needle part! Ouch! I don’t like this part a bit! Doods has no choice but to torture me every night! *Sob*
.
.
Egg retrieval is tentatively scheduled on the 6th of February. Give or take a day depending on the size and maturity of the eggs. Tomorrow morning, we will be in for the last ultrasound and blood work. As of today, things are looking up. We are praying that things will continue to be good. If things go as planned, the next step would be the fertilization and freezing. The embryos will be cryopreserved until August, the only available time Ima has to undergo the month long screening and implantation.
.
For Doods and I, the question of “to be or not to be a parent” has been decided. It is… YES, to be! A tough decision, but one that is worth all our time, effort and everything else that we’ve got. Whether WE WILL BE is yet another thing that is still unknown to us. At this point, equipped with courage and wisdom, we have already braced ourselves for all else that God has in stored for us. It would be useless to worry about things that are beyond our control, we can only hold on to the truth that no matter what, God knows what is best and He takes our happiness seriously! Right now it is more than enough for us to just savor this extraordinary swell feeling of having something to look forward to. I will not be inhibited to admit that the whole thing is really very exciting for us!
.
Please join us in prayer as we undertake this colorful and bumpy journey to parenthood.
.
The only things that stand between a person and what they want in life are the will to try it, and the faith to believe it is possible.
Rich Devos
.
.
.
Thoughts Spelled Out